Team Talk- KOEPUTKI KOLOSSALS
Season Three - Zee
Cheeky Monkeys
Introduction
The Zee are a bunch of mischievous monkey clones, known for
their cheeky antics more than any actual talent for the game of Dreadball. Their penchant for bringing extra players on
the pitch frequently lands them in trouble with the referee, but they usually
get away with it. They can be a
frustrating team to play because of their poor stats, but this is made up for
by some entertaining special rules, which mean that any game they play will usually
be a barrel of laughs.
Player Breakdown
Being clones, the Keoputki Kolossals feature only type of
player; the humble Jack. This means
there’s no different stats to remember, as everyone is the same. Fortunately, there are 10 of them on a basic
team, so at least the team makes up in quantity what it lacks in quality.
As Jacks, the Zee rock the standard 4+ Armour value, and be
prepared to roll this fairly frequently.
Neither their Skill nor Strength are particularly effective, both being a
value of 5+. Occasionally, a plucky
little monkey will hit someone, usually in the back and with a couple of his
mates already engaged, but don’t expect great things to come of it, although it
can be handy for making an opposing
player turn around.
Their poor Skill
means that shooting and picking up the ball is always a danger, so where
possible try to steal the ball, for which the Zee have an impressive value of
3+. This speed also comes in handy in
getting a bit of extra distance on a Run, an action that the Zee make more
often than most.
A Zee also comes with two special abilities: It Wasn’t Me and Runaround. Runaround solves the problem of having
too many monkeys and not enough actions by allowing a coach to spend one action
token to take a Run action with two players that have this skill. It
Wasn’t Me is a little more complicated, but very handy for helping you have
too many monkeys. Firstly, it stops the
player from committing a Distract the Ref foul.
Secondly, only one foul can be called against a player with this rule
per action token played on them, and fouls cannot be called on actions taken by
other means. Finally, and most importantly, it allows the player to react to a
foul in one of two ways; arguing the point, or blaming someone else. Most of the time, a Zee will argue and
therefore take a special roll to reduce the severity of their sentence, or they
can blame another member of their team that is nearby and they are sent off,
with a longer sentence for their trouble!
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| Hell's Kitchen Daredevils |
Team Assets
The Kolossals start with one Dreadball card, which is helpful
if you can get an extra action for your Jacks. Hopefully, you will draw the Vigilant Ref card so that it never reaches
the table!
The Zee do not come with any coaching dice (and cannot buy
them in a league or tournament), but they do have a very special team rule: Monkey Business. At the start of each of your rushes, you roll
a dice and on a 1 to 3, you receive that many coaching dice to use that
rush. This is very important, as it is
usually through a combination of a good roll for Monkey Business and a well-timed extra action from a card that the
Kolossals will actually score. It is a
good idea to use dice of a different colour to your regular coaching dice
(which can be earned from fan checks) to avoid confusion; I prefer yellow and
to call them Banana Dice.
Team Tactics
REMEMBER TO ROLL FOR MONKEY BUSINESS! …not strictly a tactic, but very important
and often forgotten! I find it helpful
to put your action tokens into a pile and put something on top of them, like a
dice, to help you remember (coach models are good for this too).
The Kolossals are a difficult team to win with, and there
are two things you must accept: you will not remove an enemy player for very
long if at all, and you will not win by landslide, unless you are both incredibly
lucky and your opponent is inept (this does not make for an interesting
game). The latter of these means that if
you are to win the game, it will go the full 14 rushes and you must prepare for
this. I find the most effective way to
win is to bog down the rear strike hex with a least three monkeys so that the enemy
cannot get too far ahead with the score; also, try and keep a Zee in each other
strike zone to stop two pointers. Save cards
and score when you roll well for Monkey
Business; it’s nigh on impossible any other time!
Don’t foul just because you think you will get away with it,
foul with a purpose. The more
opportunities you give your opponent to call foul, the more monkeys that will
be sent off. If you want to commit a
Sneak foul, do it with your later actions (but before attempting to pick-up the
ball) to limit your opponents ref rolls.
However, I would recommend that you try and get all your available
monkeys onto the pitch every turn; they are great for gumming up the board and
ensuring that there’s a monkey in the right place at the right time.
If, by some miracle, opposing players do leave the pitch,
don’t forget you can send a couple of Zee to go and stand on their subs entry
hex to stop more players coming on. It’s
a bit cheeky, but can surprisingly effective if you can keep the ref down the
other end of the pitch!
Cheatyface Crew
League Play
As with most teams in a league, I would be looking at
enlisting the help of an Offensive Coach as soon as possible; the ability to
spend 3 actions on one player is a massive boon, especially to Jacks intending
to Strike. The coach will reduce the
reliance on cards to provide extra actions, freeing up action tokens for your
players.
I have known the Zee to have
some success with using Cheerleaders to gain extra fan checks, which are
helpful for earning coaching dice, and if your league is using the rules for
fans from Season four, cheerleaders are especially helpful in netting you a few
extra dice. Furthermore, fans are great
for clogging up the pitch even more, but you need to way up if you want to
bring on a fan or ‘take the pips’ and earn a dice the old fashioned way. The Fans are also another great way to gain XP for your players.
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| Eurocorp's Eugenics Project |
Tournament Play
Unless you are really, really, REALLY confident with the
team, I would not recommend taking the Kolossals to a tournament if you are
interested in winning; if you are content to just have a nice time and play
some games, go right ahead!
With your 20mc to spend on extras, I would purchase an
Offensive Coach for 8mc, to give your Jacks the all-important third
action. Zee cannot buy coaching dice, so
my other recommendation would be to give two monkeys an upgrade, for 5mc
each. These have to be rerolled every
game, but it very unlikely that neither would receive a Skill upgrade, which is
what you should be aiming for, and will be instrumental in winning your games.
Coach Kenzie's view
I have played a few times against the Zee. Against the Asterians they are so infuriating as they shut down the entire game plan of sending players off. The clogging up of the field is to be honest, brutal!. I've even been shut down with a single little Zee standing on my team entry hex arguing(It wasn't me) with the Refbot to stay there, so I was unable to bring any new players on to the field.
Against my Humans or Orx they tend to cling around the Guards and Strikers to generate the two threat hexes, Making it harder to score or slam against them.
The fact that they are a team consisting entirely of Jacks makes the team not overpowered as they have to work hard to get the results they need.
When i asked some of the players why they liked playing with the Zee, the Response from the Cheatyface Crew coach was "It's because they cheat."
So it definitely seems that Zee players love the flavour of the team rather than the results that they produce.
Conclusion
The Keoputki Kolossals are an incredibly flavourful team,
and most games played will be fun and memorable for both players. They are not well suited to new players, and
are unlikely to be seen near the top of a tournament, but if you are happy not
to take the game too seriously and want a break from winning, the Zee are the
team for you!
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